Shortage of Fleet Enemas In DC Threaten To Cripple Black Gay Pride Activities
As thousands descend upon DC for its annual black pride festivies, something other than the weekend's forecast for rain may put a damper on the celebration. Local retailers are stuggling to keep up with the demand for what many call a pride must have. A Fleet Enema.
"We just can't keep them on the shelves" local CVS manager Kimberely Martin told us. "As soon as we put them out they're gone. I saw one man come in and grab 10 at a time."
In particular, the new Master Blaster Super Rinse Edition is sold out all over the nation's capital. "This new edition fleet is reuseable and promises the water will be clear after 2 flushes." Karen Disek of Fleet Dynamics said in a press release published earlier in the week.
"We're doing what we can at the moment to contain the situation, we have asked that everyone try to remain calm" Police Pride Liason Markus Jackson said in a statement to us earlier. "There are several things we can do to combat the shortage. We're asking attendees if they have an extra fleet to share it with a friend. To reduce the amount of sex parties they attend or participate in from fifty to just two or three."
One DC LGBT Wellness Center "We Helping Ya'll", has even set up a bottom share program as well as handing out fleets made from recyclable materials.
"With the shortage we're just trying to keep everyone safe, so we're pairing multiple tops with a single bottom, and so far we've had great success" a spokesperson for the program told us. "We've also been teaching those who can't afford to buy enemas how to make their own with balloons, a bit of string and some cocoa butter."
If you or someone you know is without a fleet this season you can call the Red Cross helpline 1-800-FleetWeek.